A Synth for People Who Like to Write Songs and Mild Panic

Orchid is a 12-key, 16-voice, ultra-portable synth that claims to “help you find what’s on your mind.” Which is convenient, because what’s on your mind now is whether you’ll be one of the chosen 3,000 humans allowed to buy this thing in Drop 2 (a marketing strategy like any other)

The features? Three synth engines, chord generation magic, a harp mode, built-in speakers and a bass engine. It also comes with Loop Mode, for when you want to feel productive without ever finishing a song.

And yes, it only has 12 keys. But don’t worry — it has a mystical chord matrix that makes those 12 keys feel like a full keyboard, or at least like you’re doing something extremely advanced, even if you're just mashing a couple of buttons.

The thing is beautiful, isn't it?

Drop 2 of Orchid goes live today, because nothing says "musical innovation" like lining up digitally to buy an instrument as if it were a Supreme hoodie. Only 3,000 units will be released, because clearly, what every songwriter needs is the tension of a sneaker drop.

To get one, you must join “The Garden,” Telepathic’s community-slash-cult, where you can help "shape the future of Orchid." Translation: you get to bug-test their synth while paying full price and feel emotionally involved in firmware updates.

In short: Orchid is a synth and a mild psychological test wrapped in pastel. Do I need it? No. Will I still try to buy it like it’s my last chance at happiness? Of course.

Because fuck, this thing looks pretty amazing to write songs.

UPDATE: I got one.